Archive for the ‘leadership’ Category

Family Meeting

Thursday, February 2nd, 2012

Posted by Tiffany Cooper

Meetings. They happen every single day of the week all around the world. Some people cringe at the thought of a “meeting” and others get warm fuzzies thinking about gathering to deliberate and eat. After all, the greatest meetings have yummy food!

As a woman in ministry, I’m sure you’ve participated in your share of meetings or listened to your husband’s recap of his own. Not only do the greatest meetings have yummy food, they also have a clear purpose and a specific end goal. They make the organization better.

The JustONE Virtual Conference is like our all-inclusive “family” meeting. We meet together for 4 consecutive weeks to hear from women who share our same heartbeat for life and ministry. Are we encouraged? Yes! Are we challenged? Absolutely! Are we sometimes lovingly corrected? Thankfully, yes! Our purpose and goal is being “virtually” accomplished.

My favorite meeting happened this week, the Cooper Family meeting. The purpose was to review our families’ responsibilities and goals, which had lost consistency over the last month. We challenged our kids to refocus attention on how they are treating one another, to speak and act in love. We corrected behaviors that were displeasing. Most of all, we laughed! My heart felt like it could burst from the love I felt in that moment. Family meetings not only improve our function and focus as a family, they deepen our bond.

We can be guilty of having meetings for everything but our families. Today I encourage you to set aside time to have a family meeting. They don’t have to be long; our Tuesday meeting was only 20 minutes.

How to prepare for your family meeting:

  • Plan ahead & write it on the calendar. If you don’t, it probably won’t happen.
  • Prepare any materials that may help reinforce your discussion. I print out our responsibility chart so my kids can see it while we’re talking.
  • Have something yummy or special to enjoy while you’re meeting.
  • Set the tone. Let them know that your family meeting is important and valued in your home. Stay focused, be firm when necessary and speak in love with understanding.
  • End on an encouraging note.

Some topic suggestions: (You can alter these if you don’t have kids in the home or if you’re single)

  • Praise your kids for what they are doing well.
  • Challenge them. Correct them if needed. Discuss areas you would like to see improvement. Present a plan to accomplish your family’s goals. Revisit the plan throughout the year to keep everyone focused.
  • Ask your kids about what is happening in their lives, the positive and negative. Inquire about areas you can help them more. Let them know that you are their biggest supporters.
  • Ask them about their dreams. This will help you to know how to encourage and guide them. Encourage*Encourage*Encourage!
  • Don’t just talk it, walk it! It doesn’t matter how great your family plan is if you don’t live it yourself. Your words are just a dream if your actions don’t scream integrity. The goal is for your talk to reinforce what you already walk, that’s power.

Let’s converse! Did you grow up with family goals? Family plans? Do you have goals for your family? How do you communicate these goals to your kids? How do you keep the goals in focus in your life?

After The Wedding Wednesday… He Aint’ Leading And I’m Not Loving It

Wednesday, February 1st, 2012

Posted by Trisha Davis

You can see all the “After The Wedding Wednesday” and contact Trisha here.

This week at Leading and Loving It we’ve had the awesome opportunity to hear from some amazing women at the JustONE Virtual Conference about expectations we as pastors wives place on ourselves. Not only did I learn a lot, I felt challenged to ask myself several hard questions. But one question in particular kept coming to mind:

What expectations do I place on myself?

The crazy thing is the more I thought about this question the more I kept thinking of my husband, Justin. Holly Furtick spoke on “not ridding your husbands spiritual coattails” so maybe that’s why Justin keeps coming to mind. This conference after all is about me… right? So why do I keep coming back to him? But that’s just it; my first thought was of Justin because often times I expect things from him in ways God never designed him to give. This is the gray area of being led spiritually by our husbands and not living vicariously through them.

Often times, I unknowing place God size expectations on Justin to lead me in the areas of my life I’m not willing to let God lead. It’s the darker side of the gray when these types of questions and statements constantly invade my heart and mind:

Why did he just put that on our calendar when he knows I have______ that night?

What was he thinking telling me to read that book on parenting? Did he forget I stay home with this kids? I kinda know what I’m doing!

Why didn’t he tell me the car needed gas? Better yet why didn’t fill it up with gas?

What is up with him leaving is underwear next to the hamper (oh, wait all husbands do that) :)

Why didn’t he come and rescue me from my conversation with ____ knowing full well she was draining the life out of me?

Why didn’t he (fill in the blank).

Why isn’t he reading my mind?

We all have a list that if left unchecked will allow the gray to grow dark. Our heart grows dark to the point we resign to the fact that our husband will never meet all of our expectations.

Because he wont…

Because he can’t…

Because he wasn’t meant too.

Coming back to the original question is where we find the root of the issue. When I think about the expectations I place on Justin what I’m really struggling with is the expectations I am placing on myself. When I lean into the darkness I am consumed with the thoughts that I will disappoint people, but especially Justin. So if I can get him to “do” the things I think he should be doing then he will notice me. If he fills my car with gas or praises me for reading “that” book then I know he values me. But the one time he doesn’t follow through with that praise or with that gesture I loose my luster and become gray. No longer do I live with the light of Christ but rather a blurred, dulled view of my value because of unmet expectations that Justin didn’t place on me, but I placed on myself.

Maybe that’s you today? Maybe you feel like everyone else around you shines with contentment to be who they are while you struggle to be noticed. Maybe you’re caught in the trappings of unrealistic expectations of yourself and your husband? My prayer for you today is that you will look to a Savior who has given you only one expectation to live by:

To live as a Daughter of the King!

A daughter who loves…

A daughter who rest …

A daughter who trusts…

1 Thessalonians 1:4

4 We know, dear brothers and sisters,[b] that God loves you and has chosen you to be his own people. 5 For when we brought you the Good News, it was not only with words but also with power, for the Holy Spirit gave you full assurance[c] that what we said was true.

Just One Recap…

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

Posted by Brandi Wilson

I hope you guys have been enjoying the JustONE Virtual Conference. It’s been so great, better than we ever imagined. Such wisdom and honesty from all the speakers involved. In fact, it’s been so good that we’ve decided to put our Why I Have Friends series on hold until the end of JustONE and make Tuesdays our JustONE Recap to give you guys a place to share your JustONE takeaway.

So, let’s chat about JustONE week 2! To get a thorough recap I’m gonna narrow it down to one thing that really spoke to me from each ladies’ message.

First up, Makeda Pennycooke

My JustONE takeaway from Makeda’s message began with an analogy of watching/babysitting her sister’s kids. Makeda continued to explain how her sister, like most parents, only uses people she trusts to watch her children. Then Makeda compared our job in ministry to God trusting us with his children. She wrapped up with “What a gift of trust He is offering us. He equips us. The Father trusts you! Rest in that.” Chills…

Then onto Holly Furtick

I love hearing Holly address the importance of not riding the spiritual coattails of your husband or your church. Holly so eloquently challenged us by saying, “God wants to pour into me just like He wants to pour into my husband in a way that is unique to me. He must pour into me before I can pour out!” Amen!!

Followed by Julie Richard

Julie shared her personal story of embracing who God created her to be. She reminded us the most important key in knowing who you are is to get time alone with your Creator. If you’re interested in art, a particular hobby, music you learn as much as you can about the creator of what interests you. The same is true with discovering who God created you to be. “To embrace your identity is FREEDOM!” Preach!

Onto Tricia Lovejoy

Tricia shared some practical, yet challenging, way to appreciate your unique spiritual gifts. “A spiritual gift… the God given ability for doing certain things well, they are given to add value to those around us, not for our own benefit.” What a great truth that our spiritual gifts are for the benefit of OTHERS!!! Boom!

And last, but certainly not least, our own Lisa Hughes

Lisa focused on expectations and how to decide whose opinions matter. She suggested that when dealing with expectations to always to back to the Word and DCH (David C Hughes) obviously, you insert your husband’s initials here! :) Lisa’s last line really hit home with me… she said, “You won’t always get it right, but always be guilty of TRYING to get it right!” Holla!

Good news… You still have two opportunities to catch JustONE today at 11am EST and 9pm EST.

Would love to hear from you guys what was your JustONE takeaway from this week’s conference. Let’s chat it up in the comments.

JustONE Conference … Week 2

Sunday, January 29th, 2012

Week 2 of the JustONE Conference kicks off tomorrow! This is all you need to know.

1. The JustONE website: http://live.mediasocial.tv/leadingandlovingit

2. You can watch JustONE through Facebook. Just “like” our FB page, click JustONE, and jump in: http://www.facebook.com/leadingandlovingit

3. The official hashtag: #justoneconf

4. To join in on the chat, just sign in with your FB or tweet in using #justoneconf

5. Having trouble viewing the video? Since this media page is based on the FB platform, signout of your personal FB page because that may cause interference on some computers.

Follow this link for FAQs and tips: http://www.mediasocial.tv/Help/GeneralFaqs.aspx?aid=120&

6. This week’s session will be shown 4 times (Monday and Tuesday 11am EST/8am PST and 9pm EST/6pm PST). You’ll get to hear:

“And that special gift of ministry you were given when the leaders of the church laid hands on you and prayed–keep that dusted off and in use.”
Speaker 1: Makeda Pennycooke, @makeda619 Executive Pastor at Freedom House Church
Speaker 2: Holly Furtick, @hollyfurtick Lead Pastor’s Wife at Elevation Church
Speaker 3: Julie Richard, @JulieSRichard Senior Pastor’s Wife and Director of Sisterhood at Lake Hills Church
Speaker 4: Tricia Lovejoy, @tricialovejoy Lead Pastor’s Wife and Leader of Girlfriends at Mountain Lake Church
Speaker 5: Lisa Hughes, @lisahughes Senior Pastor’s Wife at Church by the Glades

We look forward to seeing you this week! It’s going to be another great time! Invite your friends to join in. And if you gather with friends or co-workers to watch, take a picture and send it to us so we can post it!

Thursday, January 26th, 2012

Last week you were given a LOVE CHALLENGE! As of today, you have 5 days to prepare your 14 day game plan! (You can get ideas in last week’s blog post.) I enjoyed reading your comments last week and thought I’d highlight a few of them.

“I’m in…pray for conviction and sincerity. My marriage is a challenge at best, but we deserve better and I can do my part to make that happen. I can do anything in Christ who strengthens me!”

I was so proud of our friend for making a choice to take on this LOVE CHALLENGE even though it may be tough. You may be in a situation just like hers, but I challenge you to “do your part” and trust God to help you. Remember these 14 days are about your husband, it’s about rocking his world.

“Love it! I’m in. Just something to remember…we tend to give love like we feel loved (I’m so guilty of this!) Be sure and give love to your man and family in their Love Language…not yours.”

Wondering what “Love Language” is? Gary Chapman wrote a great book titled The 5 Love Languages. You can also visit his website for great marriage resources.

“How fun!! Kinda like a shorter, less intense, version of the Love Dare. Count me in!”

I know! This challenge can be loads of fun!!! What’s the love dare? Check out the The Love Dare website for book info and marriage resources.

I love this! My husband is going to love it even more. Our men like it when we pursue them;)

Right on, Sista! Even though your husband may not tell you that he feels valued and loved when you pursue him, chances are he really likes it! Even if he doesn’t know he likes it, he does!!! Pursuing him may mean you have to step out of your comfort zone and operate out of your normal…you can do it! Find courage in knowing that your Leading and Loving It friends around the world are doing it too. Plus, the more you pursue your husband the more comfortable you will feel. As they say, practice makes perfect.

“I LOVE THIS!!! I’m going to do it:) My husband and I are in the biggest transition of our lives and although God has been moving us forward I have to admit it has been rough on our marriage…I must THANK GOD for his grace. I believe the best thing we’ve done is to talk it through no matter what and pray for each other. I believe this challenge will be balm to my marriage.”

I love that she thanks God for his grace. So true. Where would we be without God’s grace? Transitions, both positive and negative, always impact a marriage. Marriage is the first transition! Then comes careers, children, friendships, ministry and on and on… If a transition has impacted your marriage in an undesirable way, I encourage you to join our friend in bringing healing to your marriage with this LOVE CHALLENGE.

All right ladies, let’s do this! Again, we would love to hear what you’re doing for the LOVE CHALLENGE. We all need 14 ways to purposefully love our husbands. Comment with your ideas.

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ...98 99 100 Next